As a constant student of communication and leadership, I often find myself looking at the world through a leadership filter.  The other day I came across a humorous email that was teaching us about life lessons we could learn from a dog.  However, as I read the list, laughing hysterically, I realized there was a lot of value in the lessons.  So, with a few modifications, I have decided to share with you my list:

Remember, if a dog was a Leader you would learn things like:

– When you see people, always run to greet them.

– Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

– Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy and to live passionate.

– Take naps to rejuvenate.

– Stretch before rising.

– Run, romp, and play daily.

– Let people touch you.

– Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

– On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

– On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

– When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

– Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

– Be loyal.

– Never pretend to be something you’re not.

– If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

– When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

ENJOY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY!

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Leaders are often looked upon for many things.  They are looked up to for inspiration, guidance, direction, and so much more.  But possilby one of the most overlooked areas that a leader is looked up to is for HOPE.  Where there is hope there is a future, and one of the greatest gift a leader can pass to their followers is HOPE.
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In the 1940’s Nazi Germany was threatening the entire civilized world and Adolph Hitler was intimidating his neighbors.  As Neville Chamberlain, the Prime Minister of Britian, was cowering in the corner his predecessor, Sir Winston Churchill, was preparing to redeem his country.
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After the war, Winston Churchill was once asked by a reporter what his country’s greatest weapon was against Hitler’s Nazi regime. Without skipping a beat, he said: “It was what England’s greatest weapon has always been - hope.”
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John Maxwell teaches us that a leader must acheive the buy-in from their followers in regards to the vision.  But what gives the vision it’s power is simply the Hope it gives back to its followers.

[I recently took a 4-week class on Storytelling for Professionals from the Denver Center of Performing Arts.   I am always looking to learn new things and improve.  So I wanted to share that story with you and see what you think.  Your comments are warmly welcomed]

Photo by: Thomas D. Mangelsen

As a professional wakeboarder, the last place I ever imagined wakeboarding would be Alaska.  So, you can only imagine my shock when I received an invitation to teach for a week at a small summer Bible camp in a place where the ground is still frozen only a few inches beneath the surface, and the mosquitoes are so big they have been known to carry people away.

Let me share with you a story about how leaders lift others up.  They reach down and pull others up to enjoy life’s pleasures. They arrive just in time to be a support.  I witnessed this on my second invitation back to Alaska between two young campers. 

I was very excited to be going back to Alaska because this year both my best friend and I were chosen to teach Wakeboarding to 40 Teenagers.  Bart and I, along with my wife had arrived a few days early to take in the beauty of Alaska.  We spent three days hiking through lush rain forests looking for an Alaskan Grizzly Bear, and after three days had seen none. 

We finally arrived at the camp for the ‘meet-and-greet’ with the staff and campers, and I looked around to see if I recognized anyone from the previous year.  That is when I saw Hannah.

Hannah was a young energetic teenager, and she had been one of my students the year before.  But this year she had chosen to become a Junior Counselor and take on a leadership role at the camp.   

Hannah introduced me to a camper named Jillian.  She was a first year camper and it was easy to see she was uncomfortable.  Her appearance led you to believe she was aged well beyond her 17 years. She was an outsider and the other kids avoided her because her posture remained closed to approach. 

After our introduction to the campers, Bart, my Wife, and I grabbed our fishing rods and ran for the river.  One of the highlights for the instructors is the proximity to the world famous Kenai River.  We were there in early July when the Sockeye Salmon had just begun their spawning run.  More importantly, this year I was determined to win my pride back from my wife who had caught the largest fish the year before.  

The next morning when we arrived at the lake it was amazing.  The scenery reflected off the water like a Thomas D. Mangelsen nature photograph.

We were teaching on a small 50-acre lake, which was one of two lakes in the region warm enough to do so.  The lake was only about 10 feet deep and lined with beautiful homes.  However, instead of boats sitting in their docks, there were planes, and as we taught, planes would land and take off over our heads. 

Before teaching it is always customary to take a test run in the boat, and I had just turned around on the far end of the lake when a Bald Eagle flew down from his nest and flew right next to me no more than 10 feet to my right.  Often, I would find that in the middle of a camper’s lesson, I would stop the boat to look at a moose that had waded out to the middle of the lake to feast on the lush vegetation. 

When I pulled back up to the dock, the campers were unloading out of the vans getting ready for their first lesson.  That is when I spotted Jillian.  She appeared shy and weary and when she approached the boat, I was afraid she just might fall in the water.  

The campers wanted to watch one of us do a demonstration before we started, and, to be honest, I was very nervous.  The water was only 55 – 60 degrees, but the campers did not care.  They eagerly would jump in the water with no wetsuit and smile the whole time while there teeth chattered and their lips turned blue.  So I certainly could not put on a wetsuit and look like a wimp.  I would just have to pray I land every trick without falling. 

After I had done the demonstration, Jillian asked if she could ride in the boat with me rather than participate in the activities planned on shore.  I knew she just wanted to escape and so I agreed.  While we were on the water, we started talking about her life and how difficult it had been. 

She had been constantly handed off, back-and-forth from one parent to the other.  Now, the only reason that she attended the Bible camp was because she had received threats from a dangerous gang in her hometown and needed a place to hang out before going to live with her grandmother for her senior year of high school.   

It was clear that Jillian was scarred.  She was a good person and indeed had a bright future ahead of her; she just needed to be encouraged. 

I asked her if she had prayed about it.  She looked at me with her sad eyes and told me she does not believe in God.  How could she.  He had allowed her to live such a hard life and she had nothing to look forward to. 

I did not know how to respond, but I share my favorite bible verse with her from the book of Jeremiah – I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord.  Plans for you to prosper and not to harm you.  Plans to give you hope and a future. 

I left it at that because I needed to focus on teaching the rest of the morning, and Jillian sat quietly in the passengers side of the boat telling me when the kids had fallen and helping me handle the rope. 

That evening after Chapel, Bart and I grabbed our fishing poles and ran to the river.  My wife stayed back to get a little sleep as we were often fishing until 3am, when the sun had just set below the horizon. 

On the river, Bart asked me if I had talked to Jillian.  I replied ‘yes’.  I asked him what advice he offered her, and he said I just told her, “If she wants to know if God is real to Pray about it and Seek him”, and he guaranteed by the end of the week God would respond. 

Even though we are up over 20 hours a day, the time seems to fly by  and before I knew it we were passing out the end of the week’s awards at Chapel.  For many of the campers, this may be the only time they ever wakeboard in their lives and it is a special time. 

After we handed out the awards, the pastor got up and delivered his last message and at the end he held an alter call.  I saw Jillian get up and walk to the front and by her side stood Hannah.  It was an emotional moment and afterwards I was eager to find out why she had chosen to do so. 

I pulled Hannah and Jillian aside and asked what happened? 

Hannah looked at me and said that she wanted to do something this week that increased her faith, and she was praying a listening hard all week for God’s Voice.  She explained that the night before as the rain fell on the roof of her cabin she was praying for God to use her in a meaningful way.  And, she felt God wanted her to go and speak with Jillian.    That is when Hannah let Jillian finish the story. 

I looked at Jillian and she told me about her conversation with Bart.  She then said, “I was lying in my bunk last night and praying to God, that if he was real and if he loved me, he would send someone to come and speak to her about him and pray.” 

At that moment, Hannah knocked on the door.

Self Worth - the sense of one’s own value or worth as a person

I received an email that had a humorous list of comments that various New York City school teachers had made on their students report cards.  The intent was to try to improve the child’s learning capability by pointing out their weaknesses; however, these may have had a slightly different impact.  My personal favorite says, “Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig.” 

Sometimes it is hard to imagine how much a simple compliment or a helping hand can improve someone’s life and make a difference in his or her future, but with out a doubt it can have possibly the most central impact. Unfortunately, sometimes it is easy to forget, and we regretfully see someone with their faults highlighted rather than by their  potential. 

For those teachers, and even for me, this is a blind spot.  Not because I actively do not help to build someone’s self worth, but as I grow closer to those around me I tend to use this interpersonal tool.

Shortly after I graduated college I learned early on in my career just how powerful your diction and words may be.  I applied at a major corporation where my brother had been working.  Because of his referral I was able to secure a interview with a high level manager.  I remember how excited and extremely nervous I was all at the same time.  After meeting with the interviewer for a short time, she finally admitted to me that this is a Fortune 500 corporation and I was severely lacking any experience. 

She then finished the interview by telling me that I was not even qualified to be a janitor in the building. 

Dejected and very disappointed I returned home.  I remember feeling like their was no hope for me and that my future employment was not going to be what I had expected.  I had spend years obtaining a degree, and, in my eyes, it now held little value.

A few weeks later, I was meeting with my brother for lunch.  As we were exiting the building, we met his manager at the door and made small talk.  When he learned I was looking for a career he asked me to forward my resume on to him and he would see if there were any positions that would be a match. 

Shortly after, I found myself once again sitting in an interview for the same company. He looked over my resume, we spoke for some time, and then he said, “While you do not have all the qualifications we are looking for your desire speaks for itself.  It is clear that you are a self-starter and eager to learn new things.  During your four years in school you have done far more than most entry level employees.  I believe you have the potential to become a leader in this company and not only that, but I believe you would be a wonderful candidate for one of our mid-level openings.” I was offered the position.

What was the difference?  Certainly not my interview, nor my resume.  The difference was in the leadership capabilities of the hiring manager.  When you communicate or interact with someone as they appear to be, you will simply make them worse.  But when you interact with a man or woman with who they could potentially become, you will make them what they should be.  That manager understood this principle very clearly, and as a result increased my potential with only a belief that I ‘could become’.
I firmly believe that one of the most important aspects of a leader is the constant encouragement of other’s self worth.  Helping them to believe in themselves when possibly no one else would, and lifting them to new potentials in their careers.  I appreciate a quote that leadership expert and trainer, Dr. John Maxwell, shares with his students, “Believing in people before they have ever proved themselves is the key to motivating people to reach their potential.”

A friend of mine told me a story the other day of a recent interview she had.  She had been looking for an edge, or maybe just a slightly open door to work her way up the corporate ladder.  For years, she had been networking and sending her resume at every chance.  Finally the break she needed appeared. 

After exchanging greetings with the hiring authority, the manager said, “So you are looking to move up and want a promotion, eh?”

 “Absolutely!  Doesn’t everyone?” Expressed my friend. 

The manager looked at her and said, “Not everyone.” 

Many people are looking for an edge. They invest their time in a ‘top dollar’ education, outward appearances, networking, or anything that may help them emerge better than others.   They are their very own ad agencies and continually launch new campaigns. Everyone is seeking the magic formula that will lead to success. The more competitive the field, the more relentless the search.

Do you want to know the secret to moving up and getting to the top?  When the executive team raises the question, “Whom shall we send? Who will go for us?” Be the first to stand up and say, “Here I am. Send me.” 

Nearly everyone, if asked if they would like a promotion would say, “Yes.” However, few will actually do what it takes to get there.  They look for the handout or the short cut.  They look for the entitlement.  And, those approaches will fail every time. 

What is the key to success? I believe . . .

1. Vision/Determination
2. Work ethic/Willingness to exceed expectations
3. Leadership/ Because everything rises and falls on leaders

Most of all, it is being the one who stands up and says, “You can count on me.”

Today my daughter, Lexi, is turning 17 months, which is 1yr 5mo old. What is the proper way to say a child’s age?

In honor of this day, I wanted to share a few life/leadership lessons I have learned from her.

FEAR Is A Learned Response

I like the way motivational speaker Paula White calls it, “FEAR is just False Evidence Appearing Real.”

Now, I am not suggesting that we do not have any ‘fear’ in life. Obviously, if you were hiking in Alaska and a Grizzly Bear charges you, having FEAR can save your life, and in that case, it would be positive.

At 7 months, she could walk with the aid of my fingers. Her favorite hobby to do every night for hours was to walk up the stairs. At the top she would slowly turn around and face down. It was almost as if she was preparing like a Giant Slalom skier in the Olympics. Then with the power of Bode Miller, she would press off and run down the stairs at a rapid pace. Then giggle hysterically when she reaches the bottom.

When her grandmother saw this she about had a heart attack. It was perfectly safe, but there is an element of danger, if dad trips and somersaults down the stairs daughter in hand. But, unless grandma teaches her it is dangerous, she will never be the wiser.

Lexi is fearless. If she could talk she would just say, “Dad. FEAR is just false evidence appearing real.”

We Do What We See

My daughter watches my every move. She doesn’t really understand my verbal language completely, but she understands my body language perfectly.

Every night I place her in my arms at 7:30 and go upstairs to spend quality time with her and rock her to sleep. It is my favorite time of day.

Recently, she has discovered dolls, and has one she is particularly fond of. The other day I caught her in her room when she thought I was not watching, rocking the baby in her arms and then softly placing her on a pillow and covering her with a blanket.

I think, I had better watch my behavior, I want her to grow up sweet and strong and as a positive influence on others, and what I know is this: what a leader does well in excess, his or her followers will do in moderation. However, what a leader does poorly in moderation, his or her followers will do in excess.

More important than the lessons I teach her, is the life I lead.

Those Closest To You Will Determine Your Future

We have all heard this said a million different ways: Birds of a feather flock together, or those closest to you, will determine your potential.

My daughter is a social butterfly, even at the age of 17 months. She loves to hang with other kids, especially if they are in the 4-6 age range. However, here is what I have noticed.

When Lexi is playing with kids who are nice and well behaved, she rises to the occasion and behaves as they do. When Lexi is playing with naughty kids who run around and cause destruction, she behaves at their standards, and as a result gets in trouble.

Life Should Be Fun

I am ashamed to admit there were times I was aggravated with life. I was not happy with my job, not happy with my finances, and I was basically not happy with anything. I was always one-step behind where I wanted to be. Than I had my daughter and everything changed.

“Happiness is not having what you want; it is wanting what you have.”

My daughter helps me see this more clearly. She does not know what is out there in the world that she is missing. She only knows what she does have, and she is elated with that. She laughs at everything, and life is just one big playground and adventure to her.

She runs over and watches the ants in the yard as they are awakening from the excessively long winter nap here in Colorado, and then she runs over and smells a freshly bloomed flower. Holding my hand and leading on her journey. But - my favorite moment is when she looks at me a smiles with her big gapped tooth smile, seemingly saying, “Dad. Life is Good.”

She made me realize that sometimes you really should stop and smell the roses.

There is a reason he’s considered a genius.

[The following is a short exerpt from my forthcoming book, The Modern Leader: 8 Rules For Tomorrow's Top Leaders, due to be released later this year.]

Leadership training professionals such as A.L Williams call it being a ‘Two Percenter’; Dr. John Maxwell declares it being a ‘Champion, and Mark Sanborn would call you a leader with a ‘little l‘. All of them would be referring to becoming a master motivator.

A master motivator is someone who excels at illustrated leadership, a term I use for leading by example. It is simply the greatest motivator of all time. Without the need to say a word, leaders can effectively influence others. They understand that a person’s perception of you is driven by your actions and are constantly developing their motivational skills.

Actions are the magic ingredient to making leadership better.

I have found that people want to do business with companies and individuals who follow through with their Core Values, not merely print them on their website or claim they are values they hold. They live them daily.

One day, I needed to have some work done on my wife’s wedding jewelry. I took it back to the store where I had purchased it. Like so many other businesses, they had their ‘Customer Dedication Policy’ proudly displayed on the wall. However, it is not what I could see but what I was not supposed to see that keeps me doing business with this jeweler.

On a back-office dry erase board, a hand-written note expresses the essence of a master motivator brilliantly. It simply read, “Every job is a reflection/self portrait of the person who did it. Autograph your work with excellence.”

The sign got me thinking, “Do I autograph my life with excellence?” A leader’s mark of excellence is not what they say but what they do. There is no better way to display illustrated leadership than letting your actions paint a self-portrait of yourself.

[Exerpt from The Modern Leader: 8 Rules For Tomorrow's Top Leaders. Due to be released Late 2008. Helping leaders find their voice of influence. Gen-Y to Baby Boomers will love this candid look at being one of tomorrow's top leaders.]

What makes someone a leader? Are they hired for a position of authority, and the Leadership Fairy pays them a visit and sprinkles magic dust on them? Do they start a business, hire a couple of employees, and suddenly stars instantly align and shine directly on them. (Think - Tim Robbins in The Shawshank Redemption) Or, is it that your actions cause others choose to follow and support you?

This is the first thing you need to know about leadership, it is not a title you call yourself; it is a title you earn.

Most people make a conscious decision to be a leader like Rebecca Thorman the executive director at MAGNET. She is young and raw and very talented. She is eager to make a difference in the world so she has hurled herself head first into the Lions Den. What makes her stand out is she is willing to do what it takes to become a great leader.

Some are pushed into leadership, but make the necessary adjustments to a great at it.

Then there are others who jump in, confused about what it takes, and, as a result, remain stagnant and struggle.

I have a friend who has a few blind spots. My friend has the potential to be a great leader, but like so many others, inluding myself, he struggles with the Five Fatal Flaws of Leaders.

Insecurity – A leader who is insecure should never become a leader, or a person of authority for that matter. Their leadership style is characterized as Authorocratic, which is nothing more than a polite way of saying you are a tyrannist.

Insecurity causes a leader to make poor choices. They are so afraid to show their blind spots that they will go to any length to hide them. This causes them to distance themselves from their inner circle, pushing them further into isolation.

Trust – Trust is the single most important trait a leader can possess. An inconsistent leader is expedient at best – meaning they are guided by what is advantageous and self-serving. In my opinion, there is nothing more dangerous than an unethical or immoral leader.

Inconsistency – Employees do what they see modeled. It is purely that simply. When you say one thing and do another you become inconsistent. The result is that it reduces your credibility. Employees are far to smart to follow an inconsistent leader. The strongest leaders are those whose actions influence first.

Pride – the greatest enemy of a leader is their ego. Have you ever heard, “Pride comes before the fall”? Pride in a leader has two consequences:

1. It distances you from your supporters. Because you think you are better than they are you place yourself on a pedestal above them. Then you lose touch with your people.

2. You believe you can never fail and this disallows you from being able to look at yourself with a critical eye. The lens by which you see yourself and others becomes distorted. You begin judging yourself by intentions and others by their actions, and leaders who see life this way are more concerned with Who Is Right; rather than What Is Right.

No Personal Growth – As a leader it is very important to understand that your supporters can only learn what you learn and go as far as you go. Furthermore, great leaders understand whatever they know; they have not always known it. This drives them to see more, do more, and learn more. Always ready for whatever is thrown at them and willing to adapt and change quickly.

Have you ever heard the comment, “It is lonely at the top?” Any leader who has ever said this is not a leader. If you are lonely at the top, no one is following you. As one expert said, “The real test of leadership is: If you had no ability to reward or penalize others, could you still get them to follow you?”

Unfortunately, for many self-described leaders, if their employees did not colleted a paycheck, no one would be following them.

Do you call yourself a leader? If so, rate yourself in the areas mentioned above honestly. No one is watching or listening. Then think of ways you could improve your blind spots and watch your Leadership Value improve.

I bet when you read the title you said it the same way Clint Eastwood says it in Dirty Harry: Sudden Impact.

The real power of that title is not hid behind a Smith & Wesson model 29 .44 Magnum. It is found in the reality of its attainment.

I am not by nature a mean person. Some day’s I just wake up on the wrong side of the bed or I allow something to affect me negatively. Ruminating on it instead of shrugging it off. I replay the incident in my head over and over resulting in a bad attitude.

To make matters worse, I often store it in my back pocket and use it as ammunition to self-justify when someone finally calls me on my unkindness. This very destructive habit can cause you to lash out at innocent people.

It is not that I am bad really. It is just that I have a practice of handing off my bad attitude by poking fun at or possibly insulting someone else. The good news is that it can be broken.

One of my personal goals in 2008 is to work on my attitude and kindness. Right now, I would rate myself at 7 out of 10, which is far better than I would have rated myself in the past, but I still have a long way to go. At a minimum, I should be operating at 8 out of 10.

I am not sure why we do it really. It seems silly and immature. Psychologists would say that we poke fun or insult others because of “displaced aggression or the kick-the-dog effect”. You have a bad day at work so you pass-the-buck to someone else in an attempt to feel better, but in reality with each insult we are micro-fractionally lowering our own self-esteem further.

Whatever the reasoning, I recognize this behavior to be unhealthy and unproductive, and certainly not becoming of a leader. That is exactly why I am working on changing. I read an inspiring story the other day that sparked an plan. Let me share with you the story.

Late one night while traveling in an unfamiliar city, Tony Campolo wandered into a diner where the only customers were a group of prostitutes. He overheard one of them say that tomorrow was her birthday. The next night he came back with a cake and a sign that read, ‘Happy Birthday, Agnes.’ Campolo said, “the door swung open and in came Agnes…never have I seen a person so flabbergasted. Her eyes moistened…and she started to cry.” Tony Campolo made her day.

I realized from this story that I have the ability to make someone’s day. Regardless of their outward appearance, outward emotional appearance, or my poor attitude. Without spending a dime, I can improve another’s day and possibly mine too.

After reading the Campolo story, I decided to pay a compliment, at the very least, to one unsuspecting person every day.

That evening, as the day was winding down, I had yet to make someone’s day. My wife and I had gone out to dinner and stopped off at Office Depot on the way home for a few supplies.

As we were checking out I noticed the cashier was a little shy, soft spoken, and introverted. In a way, she reminded me of the actress in the hit TV show Ugly Betty. I noticed her nametag said ‘Rebekah’. It was spelled a little differently that the traditional ‘Rebecca’.

I looked right at her and said, “That is a beautiful way you spell your name. It makes you very unique.”

Her face lit up as she said, “THANK YOU!” Then she became a little embarrassed and quickly looked down again. I couldn’t help but notice her facial expression never let go of that bright smile as her hands now danced as she counted back our change.

If you are like me, and I hope that you are not, many times you wait for someone else to treat you right before you treat him or her right. Or worse, you hand off your dirty laundry to them in an attempt to make yourself feel better.

Don’t wait! Be the first to brighten someone’s day and you will be amazed how good it makes you feel.

Mark Sanborn, author of You Don’t Need a Title to be a Leader, says in his book, “You don’t help others when you feel good. You feel good when you help others.”

Great Leaders often lift others and raise them up to join in life’s celebration.

My Brother emailed me just this picture the other day.  I printed it out and taped it to the wall above my office desk and it got me thinking…

… and I just can’t get it out of my mind. 

Which one are you, the lion or the gazelle?

Judging from the title, I am certain almost everyone can relate to the second statement, while many are now wondering what I mean by the first half. 

Let me take a moment to explain the importance of a leader loving those he or she leads.

I live in Denver, Colorado, and we are surrounded by the majestic Rocky Mountains.  Located just a short drive away is Rocky Mountain National Park (RMNP), one of America’s most amazing natural showcases.  My family and I love to drive through the park and witness its awe-inspiring beauty. 

Imagine for a moment that you have taken your family to visit RMNP, and, while you were on a short hike, one of the well fed and slightly overweight ground squirrels runs up to your child begging for any scraps of food in their backpack.  You most likely would not be afraid, and may even reach out your hand in an attempt to befriend this wild creature. 

Now, imagine that you have ventured a little farther on the trail when you hear the spine-piercing roar of a Mountain Lion, and turn around just in time to send your family scattering in every direction.  The Lion locks on to your children and begins to chase them to the base of a cliff where he has them cornered – but, instead of attacking, he walks up to your children and licks their little faces. 

If that happened, which animal’s gentleness would you appreciate more?  You would appreciate the lion’s gentleness more, because he could easily have attacked the children without violating his character as a lion. 

The same goes for a person of authority.  They easily could cast their punishment or judgment upon their team, without violating their authority.   However, when a leader expresses empathy and love on their team when nothing is running as scheduled, their grace is appreciated much more. 

It is when a member of his or her team is at their lowest and cannot believe in himself or herself that a leader’s gentleness is most needed.  Most bosses would take the opportunity to cast fear into the hearts of their employees, but a leader does just the opposite and encourages their team. That is the exact moment when you become their inspiration, and when they need a friend most.

Pepper Rodgers coached at UCLA during some of the lowest points in the school’s decorated history.  Rodgers once told a reporter, “My dog was about my only friend, and I told my wife that a man needs at least two friends.  So she bought me another dog.”   

Which side are you going to take when the time has come to inspire or belittle?  Are you going to be a friend or a foe?  Neither one is going to violate your authority, but only one is going to improve your standing as a leader and the character of the team.

I prefer not to be referred to as an expert. 

Seems silly, I know. By definition, someone considered an ‘expert’ possesses a special skill or knowledge in some particular field, a specialist, or an authority.  Sounds first-class and would be a badge-of-excellence anyone should be proud to wear.  However, it is the connotations, not the definition, that I think of that hold me back from wishing to be an expert. 

Is it just me, or have you also noticed that everyone seems to be an expert these days?  I read weblogs where the author writes they are a ‘self-described expert’.  That comment always provides me with a good chuckle, and is precisely why it is not the primary meaning of the word that keep me from liking it, rather, the misuse, abuse, and insinuations that are associated with it. 

Don’t get me wrong, when someone refers to me as an expert, I am flattered.  They are just paying me a complement; however, you will never hear me call myself an expert.

I do not want you to misunderstand, I am not trying to insult anyone who calls himself or herself an expert.  I simply feel that when you refer to yourself as an expert it can hinder your ability to be a leader.  Here are five reasons why being an expert can hold back your leadership’s maximum potential:

Being an expert signifies you have arrived.  Do you remember the story of the turtle and the hare?  The hare believes he is so fast, he becomes arrogant and overly confident and he stops to rest.  (Why? Because he has arrived in his own mind.)  And while he sleeps the turtle steadily pushes along and wins the race.  I bet to this day, the turtle never stopped going. 

Leaders should consider themselves a Turtle.  They should just keep moving along, learning everything they can along the way.  Why? Because when people chose to follow your example, they will only go as far as you go.   As you grow and improve, so will those you lead.  A leader never arrives. 

Being an expert says you are a know-it-all, and have nothing left to learn. The only people I would consider calling experts were a few of my college professors.  Attending college for an undergraduate degree was as much about learning new skills toward your intended profession, as it was about critical thinking.  God Forbid, you ever question a thought your professor wrote in one of their personally drafted, excellently perfected textbooks.  After all, you are simply an eighteen year old, and they have been around long enough to have debated with Socrates himself. 

Being a Know-it-all is the Achilles Heal of leaders, because it gives off the impression:

• They are much better than the ‘little people’.
• They did it without the assistance of others.
• They arrive at their destination without others.
• They would like to separate themselves from everyone else. 

Being an expert often creates close-mindedness. Aristotle once said, “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”   When you are an close-minded, it will cause you to be defensive and protect your knowledge at all costs.  How can you be open-minded when you are defensive? 

Jon Wooden taught his team best when he said, “It is what you learn after you know it all that counts.”

Being an expert signifies you are above everyone else.  Have you ever heard the comment, “it is lonely at the top”?  Anyone who has ever been a good leader knows this is not true.  When you are a leader, you surround yourself with your team and utilize the strengths of every member to complete the task.  Therefore, to lead effectively you can never be above your team. Realistically, when you have a good team, who needs to be an expert?

Being an expert often leads to giving a person an ego and makes them prideful.  An oversized ego or a person’s pride is their greatest enemy.  When a person is prideful they are more concerned with whom is right, rather than what is right. 

By contrast, Character, is a leader’s best friend.  Character is the predetermined values, ethics and morals, not associated with a specific religion, culture or country, that a leader chooses to engrave into their personality. 

Of those qualities, humility, may be one of the most important.  Humility is the quality or condition of being humble; modest opinion or estimate of one’s own importance.  When you have an ego, it directly conflicts with this quality and causes Prideful Issues:

• You will believe you can never fail.
• You will believe that rules do not apply to you.
• You will reflect a negative attitude to the team.
• You will disconnect from the team.

How can you look at yourself with a critical eye when you are egotistical and prideful?

It is my opinion, that when you refer to yourself as an expert, you will hold yourself back from achieving your greatest potential.  You will mentally stall yourself and slow down your ability to grow. You may even find yourself lying by the roadside sleeping while others pass you by.

I love this quote by Earl Nightingale, I used it in one of my recent posts, “If you spend an hour a day on any given subject.  After five years your will become an expert.”  What he is really saying is not that after five years you will arrive and can prance around bragging about everything you know.  He was really saying that growth is not a routine progression, and you should continue to grow, learn, and achieve new things - indefinately. 

Isn’t that what we are all striving to do… to reach our maximum potential?  In fact, that is one of the goals of this blog.  To help you reach your maximum potential, and I cannot do that if I do not continue to improve.  That is why you will always hear me refer to myself as a permanent student. Or sometimes, a scholar, meant in the most informal of terms: a student; pupil.

I will leave you with this quote from Paul Harvey, one of America’s most beloved storytellers, about his good friend Earl Nightingale, “Earl never let a day go by that he didn’t learn something new and, in turn, pass it on to others.  It was his consuming passion.”  As a leader, I hope it will be yours to.

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In today’s job market, it appears to me that everyone is trying to find a job that they love.  In fact, for members of Gen-Y, job hopping and searching to find a job they love appears to be a hobby.  Jon Morrow - a twentysomething entreprenuer and interesting blogger who has good natural perspective - writes a great post on How To Find Work That You Love. 

Wouldn’t it be great if everyone had a job that they loved?  I would offer, that a great deal of finding a job you love depends on your own perspective, and a Good Perspective is the key to finding happiness with anything.  However, instead of looking at it from Finding a Job You Love, lets look at it from a DL’s position. 

A DL is a Designated Leader, and, as one, you will endure a lot of pressure.  If you are in charge of a team it can be difficult to lift their spirits and present good leadership.

Last week I wrote about How To Influence an Employee Without Resentment, and I used an example of a Supervisor who used bad judgement in teaching his employees about customer service.  What you do as a leader has a massive impact on your team.  To paraphrase from Jim Collins‘ book, Good To Great, a leader’s roll is not to motivate the employees, but rather to not demotivate them. 

How many times have you seen a person who has been designated as a leader demotivate their team?  A thousand times, right? How you treat or motivate your team will impact their feelings towards their job and their boss, and at some level impact whether or not they have found a job they love.

Here are three suggestions to spark or increase the Joy in your team’s lives and potentially improve their perspective:

1. A keen understanding of where you stand.  Nothing is worse than standing in the middle of know where and not know where you are going.  Many times, teams are being blindly lead by there leaders with no comprehension of the team’s goals, where they are going, or where they stand.Share with your team the goals, and then turn them into their goals, in other words, get them to buy into them.  True joy will come from those who are devoted to a cause bigger than themselves.
2. Acknowledge others and lift those in need.  Positive reinforcement from the leader will do a great deal to lift your team’s spirits.  They need to hear praise and adoration on a regular basis, and those that are falling behind need to look up and see your hand helping them back up. 
3. Understand that Joy produces Strength.  Dr. John Maxwell says it best, “When you are winning, nothing hurts. When you are losing everything hurts.”When the team is joyful it will produce strength and with each new step you will increase momentum.  And believe me, momentum is a DL’s greatest ally. 

Share a little joy with your team and watch both of your perspectives rise.

The other day I was finishing up a workout at my local gym when I overheard a conversation between a supervisor and an employee.  Well, that is not entirely true, because I did not overhear it like I was eavedropping, I witnessed it along with many other employees and gym patrons.

The supervisor was attempting to teach a lesson in customer service, except he was an egotistical jerk who should not be in charge of anyone. 

“Say, Johnny. Do you know how many muscles it takes to smile?” he said as if it were trivia.

“Not Really.” replied the employee weary of the game.

The supervisor looks at another employee and sarcastically asks, “Can you tell him how many muscles it takes to frown.”

The other employee, eager to play along, mumbles his answer.  

“That is right! And it takes many more muscles to frown, than it does to smile.” he forcefully says, like a drill sergeant in boot camp.

“When you are at the front desk, you need to smile at every person. Got it?” he orders.

“Yes, sir” the employee says, while trying to hide from the eyes of the health patrons and the prideful smiles of his coworkers.

I do not think I need to continue any further with the story for you to understand what I am saying. 

The supervisor who intended to teach a lesson in customer service, did so by ridiculing and demeaning his employee in front of everyone.  And he accomplished little more than robbing this person of their dignity and honor, while humiliating them, and the message was entirely lost. 

This was probably the most ineffective way of ever getting your point across.  If the employee ever returns to work, the resentment for their boss will most likely be bursting from within them.

To be an efficient influencer of your employees or peers it is essential to lift them up and not tear them down.  A lesson is received very poorly when it is done in a contemptuous manner. 

So, how can you have this conversation and have it be well received?  Here are three simple rules that may help:

1. Talk about your own mistakes before offering a critique.  You may want to simply tell them a story, or make one up, about how you made a mistake in the past and how your supervisor devised a brilliant solution.  It would also be advisable to do it privately, and in a welcoming manner.
2. Pull the entire team together and teach an uplifting and inspiring message to everyone about your customer service vision, and include your expectations in it.  From there you will have a platform to work from.
3. Praise the slightest improvements honestly in front of everyone, and overlook the mistakes.  William James once said, “The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook.”  This will give them a reputation to live up to and make them feel good about themselves. 

Being a titled leader who has to uphold the rules and expectations of the office can sometimes be a difficult task.  However, handling people is an art and done properly can create a beautiful picture.