Some of my best memories are from when I was a radio DJ.  I worked my way up from the early morning graveyard shift to a job in commercial radio, and it was during this time I learned a lot about people, business, and myself.

Here is how what I learned will help you: 

Be True To Yourself

You can please some of the people all of the time, or all of the people some of the time – but never both. 

My introduction to radio came when I was working at our school’s Television station.  The radio station manager, Laney, watched one of my shows and suggested I do double duty in radio as well.  She said, “You have a good radio voice and we have an opening for a DJ.”  I gave it a little thought and accepted. 

The problem was - I did not know how to be a DJ.

Since my first shift on the radio was from 3am – 6am, I was certain that no one was listening.  If they were, they were only listening for the music and not any of my commentary.  So, I started to try on different personalities like they were clothes.  I went through more personalities than Beyonce does wardrobe changes at one of her concerts.

My frustration must have showed because Laney called me into her office.   I remember exactly what she said to me, “James. People like you just as you are. That is why I asked you to be on air.  Do not try to be someone you are not.  Be yourself, and you will be just fine.” 

Those were inspirational words.  Once I quit trying to be someone everyone would like all the time and just started to be myself, both the show and my confidence improved.

Lesson Learned: Do not try to change who you really are, it is what makes you unique.

Know Your Audience

As soon as I began to progress and gain confidence behind the microphone, a very sought after specialty show position opened.  Friday nights 8-11pm.  I was given the position.

I also was very nervous.  This was a popular timeslot because, in a college town, Friday night meant tons of parties, and I was responsible for the musical entertainment.  We took things very seriously because we were rated the Number 1 radio station in the listening area, and this was competing against major market Denver commercial radio stations. 

This audience would be so much different from my 3am audience.  But, it was my job to know who would be listening and what their agenda was.  If I understood who was listening then I could meet their needs.

Lesson Learned:  Never walk into a test without doing your homework.   

Take Risks

I write in my book, Developing a Million-Dollar Relationship, about how important security is for relationships. 

In radio, being secure means having a solid listener base, keeping them listening, and not making a fool out of yourself.  However, when you take a risk you create margins.  The truth is, security is not freedom from risk, but rather it is freedom to risk. 

By my senior year, I was a full time DJ.  It was a far cry from my weekly ’specialty show’.  Where was I going to come up with material to fill so many shows? I thought for awhile, and remembered something a mentor once told me.  When you do not have alot of experience borrow from those that do. 

One morning, I was walking down the hall and our new, quiet, yet extremely personable station manager, Ryan, was walking towards me.  I thought  he would compliment me when, without slowing down, he said, “I heard your show today.  It sounded a lot like so-and-so’s show, and I think he is dull.” 

Wow! What a blow to my ego.

I then worked hard to come up with original material.  When something worked well, I would add it to my arsenal to use again later. 

One day, I had a great show. Feeling good about myself, I was walking out of the studio when in walks Ryan.  He said, “Heard your show today.  You said the same thing on last Thursday’s show, and I thought that one was boring too. Take some risks already.” 

Ryan was not trying to be ugly; he wanted me to get out of my comfort zone.  I took some risks, and in the end, taking risks allowed me to produce a widely popular show. 

Lesson Learned:  Sometimes without risk, there is no growth

Review Your Progress 

To some, the hardest thing a DJ has to do for the first time is speak to the large listening audience, all of whom are invisible to you.

For me this was not the case.  While pressing the on-air button for the first time scared the hell out of me, the hardest thing for me to do the first time was review my show. 

Every time I hit the On-Air button, I taped myself on what we called ‘the skimmer’.   Once a week all the DJ’s would meet, review, and analyze each other’s work.  It was uncomfortable, because you knew you would have to replay those bad moments you hoped no one heard. 

However, every time I did this my show would improve and I would sharpen my skills.   

Lesson Learned:  Some say experience is the best teacher.  I say, Evaluated Experience is the best teacher.

Believe In Yourself

There is a fine line in show business between being cocky and being confident, but the one thing I know is that having confidence in yourself will get you further.

What is the difference?  Cockiness comes from walking into a situation unprepared, failing, and learning nothing from it.  You can witness this on American Idol when the judges tell someone they just do not have what it takes and the auditioner yells what an a$$7o!3 Simon is.

Confidence stems from preparing to the best of your ability and giving an authentic performance.  Confidence does not mean you succeed everytime, but it gives you the ablility to learn from your mistakes and improve.  Without confidence, you will simply defeat yourself and never reach your desired goal.  However, with confidence, you will be able to reach your goals. Because you believe in yourself. 

Confidence is what gives the audience a reason to believe in you. 

Lesson Learned: You have to believe in yourself before anyone else ever will.

Yesterday was my birthday.  It was a day like any other.  I try not to make big deals out of my birthday; although, my wife loves to stretch it out. 

Today I had coffee with a friend of mine, and he showed up a few minutes late.  Apologizing for the delay, but he had a minor traffic infraction on his way for failing to full stop at a stop sign.  (I had always been told the ones with the white borders are optional ) 

We had a good converstation and then had to get on our way.  He had a 11am conference call and I needed to get back to the office.  I grabbed a coffee for my boss as I ran out the door. 

I was driving past Coors Field, home of the NL Champion Colorado Rockies.  Well, sitting caddy corner to the field is a motorcycle traffic cop and a few of his closest friends radaring folks as they come up to the traffic light in front of the stadium.  Makes it kinda convenient to write a ticket. They were so good they could almost do it before the light turned green again. 

Well - he caught me, and the other 3 cars who were driving in a pack together.  Bummer. 

I was polite and handed him all of my registration and license info while he quickly wrote out the ticket.  I think he was attempting to race the light for amusement, as I thought to myself, “This is going to be one expensive cup of coffee for my boss.” 

And, as he was handing me the ticket he says with a crooked little grin on his face, “Happy Belated Birthday.  If it would have been today I would have let you go.” 

“Thanks!”

Delays are a part of business.  No matter how much you kick and scream, sometimes you just have to work through the delays. 

My goal was to have my audio version of my book available a few months ago, but it just was not to be.  Some of the tracks became corrupted, and a few more became lost.  But, nevertheless, the audio version of Developing a Million-Dollar Relationship: A Man’s Strategy To A Real Relationship is very near production ready, and I am very excited. 

Check back soon and you will find that the much anticipated MP3 and Audio CD will be available for purchase at very special prices. 

Hope you have a great day.  -James

Judging from the title, I am certain almost everyone can relate to the second statement, while many are now wondering what I mean by the first half. 

Let me take a moment to explain the importance of a leader loving those he or she leads.

I live in Denver, Colorado, and we are surrounded by the majestic Rocky Mountains.  Located just a short drive away is Rocky Mountain National Park (RMNP), one of America’s most amazing natural showcases.  My family and I love to drive through the park and witness its awe-inspiring beauty. 

Imagine for a moment that you have taken your family to visit RMNP, and, while you were on a short hike, one of the well fed and slightly overweight ground squirrels runs up to your child begging for any scraps of food in their backpack.  You most likely would not be afraid, and may even reach out your hand in an attempt to befriend this wild creature. 

Now, imagine that you have ventured a little farther on the trail when you hear the spine-piercing roar of a Mountain Lion, and turn around just in time to send your family scattering in every direction.  The Lion locks on to your children and begins to chase them to the base of a cliff where he has them cornered – but, instead of attacking, he walks up to your children and licks their little faces. 

If that happened, which animal’s gentleness would you appreciate more?  You would appreciate the lion’s gentleness more, because he could easily have attacked the children without violating his character as a lion. 

The same goes for a person of authority.  They easily could cast their punishment or judgment upon their team, without violating their authority.   However, when a leader expresses empathy and love on their team when nothing is running as scheduled, their grace is appreciated much more. 

It is when a member of his or her team is at their lowest and cannot believe in himself or herself that a leader’s gentleness is most needed.  Most bosses would take the opportunity to cast fear into the hearts of their employees, but a leader does just the opposite and encourages their team. That is the exact moment when you become their inspiration, and when they need a friend most.

Pepper Rodgers coached at UCLA during some of the lowest points in the school’s decorated history.  Rodgers once told a reporter, “My dog was about my only friend, and I told my wife that a man needs at least two friends.  So she bought me another dog.”   

Which side are you going to take when the time has come to inspire or belittle?  Are you going to be a friend or a foe?  Neither one is going to violate your authority, but only one is going to improve your standing as a leader and the character of the team.

Who you are, you are now becoming.

Nobody was created for mediocrity.  We may not all be created equally, nor can everyone be a celebrity or able to make millions.  You can witness that simply by watching the auditions for American Idol.  But each of those people have a purpose.

Furthermore, neither were the wealthy created to be mediocre. 

Regardless of your income or social standing, when you sit back and simply allow life to take its course without finding your purpose in it, you are living a mediocre life.  We all have a place in and a purpose for our life.  It is a gift we each hold within. 

The question is…What are you doing to nurture that gift?  It is my opinion that each of us is either the key to or the lock on the door to our future.  Our daily actions will either move us toward or further from our dreams and purpose.

What are your dreams?  What are you doing to nurture them and find your place in this world? 

James Allen, author of As a Man Thinketh, says, “You are what you think about all day.” Who you are, you are now becoming, and when you decide to step toward your dream you have been created for, you are literally declaring your future.

So get on with your bad self, and live an extraordinary life!